Family Mug Shot

Funny how I can buy in a little time or create some silly excuse whenever my parents willed me to do some chores. You can hear Br-Ro-Mm stuttering in the air and by the time they straighten out their tongues, I'm already safe inside my room. Pretending our resident Paula Abdul isn't blabbering around. Here's a glass of insight; that's what you get (stop singing that Paramore song will you) pa for naming me after your favorite brand of local beer and ma for allowing it anyway.

So maybe that explains too why I know nothing when it comes to beer. Brian took me to this bar over at the Haight Street called Magnolia, which is actually a brewery as well. Above their counter they have this huge blackboard listing all of the different choices. While browsing through the selection, I noticed there were certain numbers beside each item. Thinking it was the price, I whispered a comment to my brother, "Ang mahal pala." As it turns out it was the alcohol content. I just had to learn it the embarrassing way. Let's burp that away and act like it never happened folks.

As soon as he decided what to order, he asked me whether D3 was fine with me. Hold up Brah. What the hell is D3; I can't even find it in the drink list. "Fourth column, third row," he said. Oh, so he's using codes on me! Apparently it's a practical application of their Excel class in MBA. No doubt you deserved that A. Smart ass.

It just brews in the family I guess. In fact after a wine tasting adventure in Temecula, one of my Aunts bumped her head as she was riding the golf cart that was supposed to take us back to our car. All she can say to her daughter was, "Connie, your mama is drunk." For your information, that was only the first winery we visited. The rest was indeed history. Another note-worthy moment was when minutes after we drove off, we came across a black limousine. Pulling the windows down, this teenage girl lifted her tequila bottle as if wanting to have a toast with me, so in response, I did the same, except mine was a bottle of port wine. Cheers! She ended up dropping the bottle though.

A dysfunctional family we definitely are. One that can't seem to choose an ulam to have over dinner, let alone a decent name. So when I grow up and have kids, I figured I'll explain to them about how they got their stupid names. But the best part of all is that they can't do anything about it. And that it's okay.







I'm thinking Vodka? That'll give Tila Tequila a run for her money.